The article, “Who’s the true enemy of
internet freedom – China, Russia or the US?” by Morozov (2015) argues that
America is the true enemy of Internet freedom. The author illustrates this by
comparing America’s actions with China and Russia. Actions done by China and
Russia, seen as nations who curtail freedom of expression and assembly, are
more benign and are of self-protection and self-preservation. America however,
uses Internet to retrieve data from users of American technology around the
world (Morozov, 2015).
Historically, geopolitical factors made
America the world’s policemen. Actions done by the American government in
controlling Internet data is aligned to that role. However, there needs to be a
clear difference between security and surveillance. While fighting for Internet freedom, American technological companies need
to stand firm and resist any actions by the American government that is too
invasive and controlling.
America sees themselves as the policemen
of the world (Lynch, 2014). Policemen, as we understand, uphold law and order
and act as the bastion of peace and enforcement of security. America, in this
sense, takes on the task of upholding law and order around the world and aims
to secure peace and stability. Uncle Sam started becoming the world’s police shortly
after the fall of Soviet Russia as it became the sole superpower in the global
stage. As the sole superpower, the US took on this “moral obligation” to police
the world and intervene when necessary. America has intervened in political
issues around the world since from Iraq to Syria.
America has justified their actions either
by arguing that it protects their sovereignty or that it is a moral obligation to save people who are suffering. Likewise,
America argues that retrieving data of users accessibly and easily is a way to
maintain to protect their sovereignty and ensure security and peace. By
collecting these data, the American government is able to filter and pre-empt
any possible threat from happening, preventing any damage to people and
property. These data can range from narcotics to organised crime such as
terrorist strikes. Such an action will serve to preserve the social order of
the nation and the world.
On the other hand, as the American government fight for the freedom of the people, they have to ensure that they are not too invasive such that they end up curtailing their freedom instead. Argued by Morozov (2015), technological
companies like Microsoft and Google need to maintain their independence and
solidarity and not be easily swayed by the arguments by the American government. He
further argues that if companies are unable to maintain their independence they
might see their usage and support wane and users will seek other avenues to
fulfil their technological needs. This is expected because people would expect certain basic
levels of freedom and to be able to use technology without the fear of being spied
on. This is reflected as China and Russia aims to make their citizens use local
technology rather than depend on foreign countries which may have vested
interests.
America needs to understand that they are
neither obliged nor capable enough to intervene with every and any political or
social disruptions around the world. As a bastion of freedom and sovereignty,
America needs to be careful to balance on this thin line as fighting for
freedom can also be seen as fighting for restriction.
<558 words>
Lynch, C. (2014, September 24). Obama to U.N.: OK, America Will Be The World’s Police.Foreign Policy. Retrieved from http://foreignpolicy.com/2014/09/24/obama-to-u-n-ok-america-will-be-worlds-police/.
Morozov, E. (2015, January 4). Who's the true enemy of Internet freedom - China, Russia or the US. The Guardian. Retrieved from http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/jan/04/internet-freedom-china-russia-us-google-microsoft-digital-sovereignty.
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ReplyDeleteHi Guo Xiong,
ReplyDeleteComments as below:
Content & Organisation:
Interesting read. We believe that your thesis statement would be "However, there needs to be a clear difference between security and surveillance". We think it will be good if you define the difference between security and surveillance, and then elaborate your points to argue your statement.
In addition, you may want to consider bringing in more concrete evidence of America abusing their powers/authorities as "police" of the cyberspace, and use information garnered to their own selfish means, instead of the social order of the nation.
Language:
"Policemen, as we understand...." - Who do "we" refer to? Maybe you could avoid using "first person perspective" and consider phrases such as "Policemen, as generally understood..." or "Policemen, as commonly known..." instead.
Citation:
We feel that there is no need for you to quote the year/date in the following sentence:
"Argued by Morozov (2015), technological companies like Microsoft ...." as you have already mentioned this in the first paragraph. (Since its the same article and author, you don't have to repeat the year).
Good job nevertheless! (:
Jovyn and Wei Chuan
Thank you for this effort, Guo Xiong. You present a clear and accurate short summary. Your focus on the ideas associated with America and its role as the world's cop is fairly clear and interesting. Unlike your peers though, I'm not so sure that your thesis is clear enough. One might take it to be this sentence: "However, there needs to be a clear difference between security and surveillance."
ReplyDeleteSomeone else might say it is this one: "While fighting for Internet freedom, American technological companies need to stand firm and resist any actions by the American government that is too invasive and controlling."
You discuss all these points and more, and the discussion is a bit circuitous. The first step for making this a better essay is to clarify your controlling ideas. I'd suggest that you look at your conclusion and work backwards, clarifying this for yourself first.
Here are other issues to consider:
---- ….are more benign and are of self-protection and self-preservation. >>>
….are more benign and are FOR self-protection and self-preservation.
--- These data can range from narcotics to organised crime such as terrorist strikes. >>>
This sentence implies that the data itself is narcotics, etc.. But it isn't. So then how can one express that?
--- On the other hand, as the American government fight for the freedom of the people, they have to ensure that they are not too invasive such that they end up curtailing their freedom instead.
>>>
America is an "it" not "they."
---- Actions done by the American government in controlling Internet data is aligned to that role. >>> (subject-verb disagreement)
--- America sees themselves …. >>> (Again, America is singular.)
--- America has justified their actions either by arguing that it protects their sovereignty or that it is a moral obligation to save people who are suffering. >>>
their? it? their? huh?
--- a way to maintain to protect their sovereignty and ensure security and peace.
>>> sentence structure?
I look forward to your next draft.